Tuesday, September 1, 2015

Blanchard Obolsky / Caylor S/R for Bully

Blanchard Obolsky/Caylor Summary Response Outline for Bully
My Outline
Topic Sentence: Lee Hirsch’s movie Bully illustrates the devastating effects bullying has on an individual and their family.
Supporting Ideas to Prove Main Ideas: Lee introduces the audience to several youth who admit that they are being bullied and to adults who have either lost a child to bullying or know those who are struggling with it on a daily basis. The bullies’ victims are depressed and withdrawn, and struggle to move past the physical and mental abuse they are put through. Many do not trust adults, who have done little to nothing to stop the bullying and to guarantee the safety of the children, forcing their parents to watch helplessly as their children suffer. In the end, many snap and try to commit suicide or lash back at the people who have been hurting at them. Those that are successful ruin their futures, leaving their families mortified and grieving. Bully unveils how bullying wrecks havoc on the lives of youth and their family.

Response Outline
  • Topic Sentence: Bully, an emotionally-charged and eye-opening movie by Lee Hirsch, vividly shows how bullying is a serious issue in public schools that is not being addressed.
  • Claim: Bullying is a serious issue in schools that is not being addressed.
    • Set up In the documentary, the assistant principal of Murray County Middle School is seen reprimanding a child - not the bully, but instead the bully victim. Despite his protests that the bully threatened to knife him, the assistant principal tells him,
    • Evidence ...
    • “Just shake hands and let it go...He’s apologized, hasn’t he? You’re being the bully now.”
    • Explanation of quote ...
    • Instead of confronting the bully about threatening to hurt a fellow student - which is a case of malicious intent, a criminal offense - she warns the victim to either let the matter go or face more trouble.  
  • Counterclaim: The teachers did confront the bullies responsible for beating up Alex on the bus.
    • Set up: After the filmmakers showed the administrators the footage, the administrators proceeded to remove the bullies from the bus.
    • Evidence:
    • The second assistant principal confronted each of the students, warning them;
    • “You are to stop beating up on Alex on the bus, is that understood? I’m putting you on a suspension, and this incident will go into your permanent disciplinary record.”
    • Explanation: The second assistant principal did proceed to discipline the instigating students and keep them off Alex’s bus for a year, showing they that they did take action.
  • Rebuttal
    • There are those that would point on that the teachers did take actions against the bullying. It is true that the teachers did confront the bullies, and told them that they needed to stop Alex or face criminal charges. While this may be true, it should also be taken into consideration the fact that the school teachers have personally admitted that they cannot keep the children safe, and the victims of bullying say that the intervention did little or nothing to stop the bullies. 
    • In the film, Alex admits “I don’t really trust the teachers to do anything about the bullying on the bus.”
    • Later in the movie, we find out that he has gone to the administration before because the bully was slamming his head under the seat months before the filmmakers arrived, and the administration told him to stop slamming Alex’s head under the seat, but that didn’t stop the bullying from occurring later on. Although the bully stopped slamming his head in the seat, the bully started stabbing Alex with a pencil and pressing his face into the seat in front of him instead, seen in the documentary in the video. 
  • Concluding Sentence: restate main idea
    • The documentary Bully by Lee Hirsch accurately portrays how, in many public schools, the administration and teachers refuse to address bullying and its effects on the students.

1 comment:

  1. Good writing- make sure to attribute ideas back to the director/author.

    Good start to your response topic sentence. Where is your position? Where is the why to it? Good claim example, but make sure to add a citation as well as develop your explanation to include how to ties back to your topic sentence.

    I am not seeing a rebuttal progression that goes into a further development of your claim/argument. Let's work on that.

    15/20

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